For anyone who remembers their dreams, I’m sure there’s been a time or two where a dream had you sitting up in bed, heart racing, wondering what it meant. Maybe some of you looked at a dream dictionary or two but nothing really clicked. If so, this post is for you.

First, the good news: No one will ever be able to understand the meaning of your dream better than you. That’s right, we’re the experts on our dreams—after all, who else knows what’s inside of our dreams better than us?

But if we’re supposed to be the experts, why do so many of us struggle with understanding our dreams?

I’ll let you in on a little secret: you may not truly want to know what your dreams is trying to tell you.

Why not? Because dreams have an uncanny ability to hurl us right to the doorstep of some of the darkest aspects of ourselves and our lives. We may know on some level that we have to face into our shadow in order to grow and heal. But the jarring way that dreams lead us there can make it easy to dismiss or avoid them.

And so, many dreamers awaken with this push-pull, an awareness that their dream has brought to their consciousness aspects of themselves that they probably should face—and a waking-life pattern of keeping those aspects at bay. Throw a dream dictionary in the mix, and there’s a whole lot of people out there who have never experienced how a powerful dream can shift the way they understand themselves and their life.

Well, I’m on a mission to change that, and I believe it can be easier than you think. Here’s my recipe for beginning a relationship with even your most difficult dreams that is fruitful and empowering:

Trust + Humility + Support = Dream Awakening!

Let me unpack these a little.

First of all, trust.

What does it mean to trust your dream? To begin, trusting that whatever your dream is bringing up for you, you are fully ready to embrace its wisdom. Further, that true healing and growth is possible for you. Sometimes, especially when a dream is particularly dark, it can feel like our dream is out to get us, reminding us of things we would rather forget. But dreams simply insist that until face our traumas, we won’t ever be able to manifest the fullest version of ourselves. If we can learn trust the journey our dreams want to take us on, we are much more likely to receive the wisdom we need to move forward on our path.

Trust also means respect. Pay close attention to the package your dreams come in, their textures, contours, and specific details, acknowledging that every dream is a fully produced show just for you. To trust that our dreams have something powerful to reveal to us means we respect and honor the fully diversity of ways in which they come, and not privilege one type of dream over another.

Two, humility.

We must be humble when it comes to exploring what our dreams may mean. You’ll never be able to heal and evolve if you are convinced you already know everything there is to know about how you feel and what you desire. Don’t forget—you are an infinite being that is capable of infinite depths, meaning there is always more to learn about who you are. We must approach our dreams with humility, openness, and genuine curiosity. If your conclusions about your dreams come quickly to you, I suggest you slow it down just a little bit and really dig deep. You’ll get more out of your dream this way, savoring it.

If you’re unsure what kinds of questions can help you discover your dream—check out my latest cheat sheet below, “Mapping a Dream Moment”. In it, you’ll find a series of questions and follow-up questions to ask yourself or a friend when exploring a dream.

Finally, support.

Having support while embarking on your dream journey is simply essential—both inner and outer. Believing that there is unconditional love available for you to experience at any moment of your life is one of the most difficult things a human can do—but it also has some incredible rewards. Dreams alone will not teach you how to maintain in this love, because no single practice can fully encompass its vastness. But dreams can give you absolutely incredible, personal experience of it–which is a profound gift. I’m talking about those big wild dreams you’ve maybe had 1 or 2 of in your life. In one of mine, I’m riding with no saddle in a white dress, spine to spine to an arabian horse, galloping through the empty desert to meet my lover. It is my personal keepsake of devotion.

Once you are on a path of faith, looking for guidance from your dreams can be incredibly fruitful. You can start the process by believing that your dreams come to support you. Take the time to relish in any support or positive feelings that you experience in your dreams.

To deepen this process even further, engage with someone else that you trust about your dreams. Letting another person support you during your dream exploration will deepen your healing. Trusting your dreams with a friend will help your mind to shift in places where you are stuck in worn patterns. Try the mapping a dream moment exercise above with a friend–for a bonus, try to maintain as much eye contact as possible while doing it.

Let me know how it goes for you dreamers!

All my love and best, Kezia

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