Here’s my confession: I have lost track of my dreams. Or perhaps my dreams have lost me…on purpose. When I began working with my dreams, I had a teacher. It was kind of a therapeutic/spiritual teacher type format, where we would have appointments each week, I would send my dreams and we would do that kind of intensive work that can happen in a 1 on 1 container.
Years passed. I started doing dreamwork with other people, and training in a more focused way to a specific method. Eventually I changed teachers, still doing the same kind of work, then changed again. Eventually I stopped going to sessions altogether, although by that point I had was doing sessions 1 on 1, which I still do today. Around that time I started doing weekly dream groups. So I was still having regular interaction with my inner life, although less so. And then I got married in March and started renovating my house, and I stopped hosting those weekly groups, and I wasn’t going to a teacher, and somewhere along that way…the dreams stopped coming in as clearly as they usually do.
To the point where even when I started doing weekly dream groups again this fall, there were multiple weeks where I had barely anything to draw on. And no matter how many times I told myself, I am gonna remember my dream tonight…a trick that has worked like a spell every time I go to sleep, when I awoke it would just slip away.
I’ve had to face the reality–I have dropped the ball when it comes to being in my relationship with my dreams. Dreams always respond to our receptivity to them. Where had my connection gone? And why? I tried to stay open to it…open to the unknowing…open to the signal of it. Maybe dreams aren’t truly for me? I can’t lie–it’s been pretty scary. I’ve felt a lack of confidence and direction with my 1 on 1 work that I hadn’t felt in years. I’ve been totally committed to a path of dreams pretty much since I began with them, and here I was, faced with being a dreamworker that can’t remember her dreams. Confusion doesn’t quite cover it…it’s been super disorienting.
But also a reckoning. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I am just at the end of my Saturn return, prompting a review of all that has happened to me since December 2014. Right at the start of 2015, I received a clarity about what my purpose in my work is: “Make dreams a thing”. When I say a “thing”, I mean a commonly used tool for humanity’s spiritual and psychological growth and prosperity. A thing like yoga or meditation or EFT. And it’s fairly clear that if those modalities were only disseminated to people on a 1 on 1 basis, with hourly costs of up to $50-120, and where results could only be realized on a relatively long time frame, they wouldn’t have the scope and reach that they do. So dreams weren’t going to become a “thing” using the same container I received my teaching in. I needed to find a way to do powerful dreamwork that was accessible and could be done in the comfort of people’s homes.
But there was one part I was avoiding–deeply exploring exactly how to do that! I think somewhere I still felt that I needed a 1 on 1 teacher to figure out what my dreams meant, even though I tell people all the time that this isn’t true. Where there’s avoidance, there is fear. Fear of what? I think truly, of what “making dreams a thing” actually means–stepping into my own power and knowing as a teacher and lover of dreams, no ifs ands or buts.
So yes, first, thank you for witnessing me here. I am completely overwhelmed every time I consider how much support I’ve received on this dream path so far—most incredibly, by the exquisitely beautiful people that I’ve had the privilege to work with over the years. But truly the whole reason I am writing this is to announce to you–for accountability’s sake–I am fully committed to figuring out what exactly what I’m talking about when I say make dreams a thing in 2018.
In 2018 I will explore how to cultivate and nurture a relationship with my dreams that is as transformative, healing, and inspiring as I know they can be—outside of the 1 on 1 container, i.e., primarily with myself. This intention of mine actually formed when I began creating the 2018 Dream Wisely planner this fall. Each and every month includes a lesson and exercise designed to jumpstart a thriving dream practice…all designed to help you determine how to work with your dreams in a way that is nourishing and transformative. And I’ll be there right alongside all the other dreamers working all the exercises and sharing all I learn along the way. To follow along, join the Facebook group Dream Wisely here. I’m filled with ideas…possibilities…fears…and the unknown. And eager to connect with anyone else out there that is ready to make 2018 the year of their dreams as well. I would love to walk this talk alongside you, as we discover together what our dreams mean to us, and how they can be a bridge between our inner and outer worlds…and ultimately to the world we all want to create.
With all my love,
Kezia Vida
P.S. If you’re in New Orleans, I’ll be hosting a Dream Wisely New Years workshop–2018: Year of the Dream January 6th. Check it out here!
Kezia!
I love this! My dreams disappear on me at times, too. Typically when I feel I need them most lol. Always a test of some sort. Seems you have pinpointed why yours is happening, being forced to learn what you’re here to teach, which is maddening and beautiful at once haha. 7 more days! LOL many blessings in 2018 for you!
Yes!! Thank you Steven. I know there are always ebbs and flows. I hope that it all becomes more clear in the months to come. It’s awesome to know that you are there by my side through it 🙂 with so much love!!
Kezia! I recognize the dreamdraught thing. It is such a relief when dreams
return (and they do, they really do. Even if sometimes they are like these tiny seeds in the dessert that ehen all hope seems lost, suddenly after a good rainspell (crying spell? 😉 are watered and start growing and blooming at full speed. I just want to let you know how much i appreciate the work you do, the work we did together last monday, your honesty here. Know you will not travel alone, I for one will be joining you, getting dreams on the mainstream agenda by working with them openly and allowing it to be a visible part of my life.
Aw Emmy that is so beautiful to me thank you for sharing that! It’s really heartening to hear you say that you want them to be an open and visible part of your life, since you have been gifted with such amazing dreams! It makes me feel so heartened to know you are on the path with me. sending you a lot of love and gratitude that we crossed paths
Hi Kezia, Thanks for sharing this very vulnerable piece of your journey.
I personally value my one-on-one sessions with my person, especially lately. My dreams have been very different lately, mysterious. Ordinarily I have a sense of what’s going on, but lately, not so much. What I’ve learned is that I’m in a totally new phase of my evolution as a human being. Thus what is happening in my dreams is totally new stuff. As my dream practitioner and I explore together I am often seeing my dreams through the lens of my experience up until now. She helps me delve deeply into what’s happening in the dream and the associations with my life experience so that I can tease out what is true for me now. This new place of freedom from my self-imposed responsibilities, obligations and the expectations of the world is often a “blind spot” right now so it really helps me to have my her accompany me on my journey. She doesn’t tell me what my dreams are about, she helps me discover their messages.
Love reading your posts! xo
Hi Cyn! It’s nice to hear from you and sending you much love. I definitely think there’s nothing I have experienced quite like the 1 on 1 container. It’s one of the most powerfully transformative things I’ve ever encountered, hands down–and that’s why I still do it. And yet there is this pull in me always….that there could be a more universally accessible way. It has been hard to trust. So yeah I just hope it’s clear I don’t mean this to say that there is anything at all wrong with the 1 on 1…far from it…just that it’s not necessarily the way that the general concepts of the dreamwork we’ve learned will be disseminated to the masses. Does that make sense? I’m curious about your thoughts. Much love as always